Fate, faith, or choice?

 

 

 Who is Tina and how did she become? Let’s back up about 15yrs and dive into life just after high school. 

 Shortly after graduating, I was able to obtain a job at Applebee’s. During my employment there I met some great influential coworkers and customers. After dedicating 5.5 years to this company, I knew I wanted more. I would have customers encourage me to move forward into a different occupation. I wasn’t sure which direction I wanted to pursue, so I followed the path of another coworker, Queenie. We took exams together in hopes to become police dispatchers. It was a long process, but the doors continued to open.

 Through another coworker at Applebee’s, I was able to meet a fellow Puerto Rican named Jessica (rare in WA). She currently worked in dental care through a community clinic and mentioned that they were hiring. Since dispatch was not set in stone, I determined this was the route I needed to go in the meantime. I applied, followed up, and was offered only a temporary position in medical at HealthPoint. As it was only temporary, I had the plan to move to New York to be with my sister after I fulfilled the position contract. 

 During the first few months at HealthPoint, I met my now husband, Daniel, at which time I was scheduled to meet with the Police Chief of Fife for a dispatch position. The meeting went well, and I was offered the position with the knowledge that I would work nights, weekends, and holidays for at least the first 5 years, since it was a seniority-based schedule. The growing relationship with Daniel pushed me to change the New York plan and stay put in the Pacific Northwest to see where the relationship would lead us. Once the contract was fulfilled at HealthPoint, I was then offered a permanent position with the clinic.

 Unfortunately, in 2014 my mom was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer at this time. After weighing options, I decided to decline the police dispatcher position, in hopes that my clinic schedule would allow for me to care for my mom as needed. Hindsight 20/20 this decision also allowed my relationship to evolve with Daniel as well. Had I taken the dispatcher position, we would’ve never seen each other as he was also working and going to college.

 I gained an immense amount of knowledge at HealthPoint medical clinic and moved up quickly. Healthcare was never on my radar, but it was working out well for me. In all honestly, the whole 5.5 years at HealthPoint, I never understood why medical fell into my lap and came so easily. The end of my HealthPoint journey was quite abrupt. It wasn’t supposed to end how it did; once again I had it all planned out. Daniel and I were now family planning, and I had become pregnant again after miscarrying twins. A mutual decision was reached that I would take 1 year off from the stressful clinic life, work temporarily part time for a family business, and then go back to the medical world. I had already spoken with the higher ups at the clinic, who were aware and on board with the plan. As many of you know now, I was never able to return once I delivered Olivia into this world. I even talked about quitting the family business because I knew this meant our lives were changing forever. I did not think working was possible for me. Luckily and gratefully, we were able to make it work; being that I have such a gracious and caring boss. Had I gone back to HealthPoint, I know I would absolutely have been fired for the amount of time I would've missed for appointments, therapies, ER trips, etc. 

 Fast forward 6 years, and I can see how critical and essential that medical knowledge was. It gave me a base understanding of procedures and protocols on the provider side, along with signs and symptoms to look out for. I’ve been able to explain processes to Daniel so that we can make the best decisions possible for our daughter. 

 Growing up, it was instilled in us that God equips you, so when the storms hit in life, you can confidently walk through them with faith. Experiencing some extremely tough times, life has shown me the choices I can and cannot make in order to propel myself forward. But in the end is it just fate, because we really have no control over the majority of life’s circumstances? As you read all the shifts I’ve made in life to become who Tina is today, as you watch on the sidelines as I continue to pivot in order to survive and thrive, one thing I can say is true. For me, there is not 1 answer, but all three apply. Fate, faith, and choice have all played a pivotal role intertwining together to build up my character. Life can be intricately beautiful, and I have learned to respect each stage as it prepares me for the next.

 

 

Every Scar Has A Story

 

Another scar another story to tell. Only it wasn’t your decision, it was mine.

I hate that medical parents have to make such intense decisions for their children. This isn’t picking out pink or purple equipment. This is putting my daughter under anesthesia for yet another surgery and implanting a pacemaker like device. Making the choice for Olivia and the enormous weight that carries can be hard to bear. We’ve already had to judge whether the Vigabatrin medication benefits to treat her infantile spasms causing severe brain damage outweighed the risk of her losing what little vision she had. Dan and I literally had to sign off on the administration at the hospital. Once that didn’t work, then came the option of ACTH injection shots. Our poor baby hit just about every single side effect that was mentioned. Having to administer daily shots to my 5-month-old baby in her thighs should’ve never been on my mommy to do list. Later came the endoscopy and a g-tube surgery. Then the big one in July of 2022, having to choose ECMO (life support) to save Olivia’s life. Before that day, I never realized the process entailed a surgery. It’s 2 cannulas (tubes) that go into a vein and an artery to pump blood outside of the body to a heart-lung machine. The machine removes carbon dioxide and sends oxygen-rich blood back to the body. This lets blood go around the heart and lungs, allowing the heart and lungs to rest and heal. In the moment it felt like a no brainer because the only other option was death. I wasn’t sure if hope was helpful or if it was just denial back then, but I couldn’t allow myself to believe hope would be impossible.

Two and a half years later, I still find myself looking at the scar daily on the right side of her neck. Although it’s healed, the emotional scar I was left to tend to seems to get torn open each time I see it. I never asked Olivia how she felt. This ever-growing invasion list doesn’t even include the numerous times we’ve had to hold her down for lab draws or x-rays as she squirms for help. Do you know how many times I’ve had to remind myself that this isn’t betrayal, I’m doing what’s in her best interest? So, when I say Olivia has another surgery coming up, please know it is just as tough as the first. She will sustain another 2 scars because of the decision I made. But if there is any chance at all that can better her survival rate and/or quality of life, I must take it. This VNS surgery means a medical device is implanted into her left chest wall just above her beating heart. The thin narrow leads from that device will be connected to the vagus nerve on the left side of her slender neck. It will send off electrical pulses/stimulation to help stop seizures once they are sensed. While this doesn’t cure epilepsy, it can help lessen the number of seizures and/or severity of them. There is thought that this can help prevent SUDEP (sudden unexpected death in epilepsy), something Olivia is at high risk for. The pressure of decision making is not fair and it’s not light by any means for medical parents.

But when I get to witness the benefits and I see your bright sunflower smile, it’s the reassurance I need to know it’s all worth it. No matter the decision, I will always be by your side.

#HopeForOlivia

 

HUSTLE FOR HOPE 5K - THE SEATTLE WAY

 April is HIE awareness month, and this year was our fifth Hustle for Hope 5K that we participated in. Not only did we participate, but we also hosted again this year for Seattle. It was created by the nonprofit organization Hope for HIE to increase awareness, education, and support. Olivia was diagnosed with hypoxic ischemic encephalopathy at birth. It's a type of birth injury causing newborn brain damage that is caused by oxygen deprivation and limited blood flow. We are hoping to transform a diagnosis that is so devastating to families, into now being a way to connect with them for added support on this journey. This year we raised $3,000 and had 82 in person participants. Thank you to everyone who made this happen! 

#HopeForOlivia #HopeForHIE #HustleForHope #TransformingHope

Below are the 2024 Hustle for Hope 5K photos
Thank you from the bottom of our hearts to everyone who is helping to make this a yearly tradition :)