Most of you know Bruno; our boxer mix dog; our first baby.
He wins the award for ‘most human like dog.’ If you’ve met him, then you get
it. He’s been our best friend and Olivia’s watch dog since the very beginning.
Even during pregnancy, he would gently place his paw or head on my belly often.
Wherever Olivia goes, Bruno is quick to follow behind. I joke that he’s our
other babysitter.
He’s also had a bit of a rough patch concerning his health,
but he’s always made it through. So, when the time came for the vet to stress
the importance of his symptoms being more concerning this time and that he required
a surgery STAT, I couldn’t handle it. I felt caught off guard. My brother
helped drive him 40 minutes to another facility for the surgery as my mom
stayed home to watch Olivia. We met my husband Daniel there and braced for the
news of what the costs would be. I always joked that I would sell my house to
save my dog, only this wasn’t a joke anymore. We literally had just sold our
home 2 months prior and had money in the bank. When the vet told us his chances
of making it through the tumor removal surgery were very slim due to its size,
not to mention how strenuous the chemo recovery would be for him, the money
didn’t matter. I sat in my car in the parking lot and cried with my brother and
husband. It was difficult to go through the emotions because I was still so
nauseous from being pregnant again. The surgery was not recommended but
ultimately the choice was left to us. One of the toughest decisions we’ve ever
had to make. If we went for it and he didn’t make it, there’s no chance for a
last good-bye. If we don’t do it, his estimated life span was 2 weeks. We
ultimately decided not to move forward with the surgery and to take him home,
love on him, and give him the best last days of his life.
My brain spiraled to the point of going numb on the car ride
home. Once again, I felt that same “zombie” mind shut down feeling like I did
when we received the news about Olivia’s health condition in the NICU. There
was just too much going on that I couldn’t get a grasp on. We had just moved at
the end of December and found out we were pregnant. Then Olivia had a beast set
of seizures demanding rescue medication that led to an ambulance ride to a
hospital stay in January. And now in February, through all the pregnancy
sickness, I’m losing my dog Bruno??
As the days passed, I looked into putting him down in the
comfort of our home. Daniel kept mentioning that Bruno wasn’t ready, but I
figured he just wasn’t ready. I mean none of us were, but I didn’t want Bruno to
suffer either. I finally gained the strength to schedule it for the end of the week
and we planned to take the day off. Only Olivia ended up getting extremely sick
mid-week and we were forced to take her to Children’s Hospital again. Not ideal
since we wanted to spend time with Bruno before he crossed over, but she needed
medical attention. I began to pray as we were in the hospital, and asked God
for a sign if this wasn’t the time for Bruno to go since his symptoms were now
subsiding. The following morning the providers mentioned in rounds that we
would need to stay through the weekend, I had to cancel Bruno’s death
appointment. I planned on rescheduling once we got home, but when we did, Bruno
had welcomed us home like nothing ever went wrong. He seemed completely back to
normal. I thought, well let’s give it a couple days and see how he does. Then a
couple days turned into a couple weeks, and I am writing this now in July, three
weeks away from his 10th birthday! I don’t know when that time will
come for him, but we are soaking up every miraculous day we do get with him.
Much like Olivia’s health, it can be so unpredictable. Bruno continues to watch
over “his baby” Olivia and they get to continue to share a bond like no other. It’s
crazy how much of what I’ve learned through experiences with Olivia, translates
into other parts of my life. Such as living in the now and being grateful for
the small things daily in life. I am forever grateful of what she continues to
teach me.
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